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Text: Listen dumbass, just because you're two times more likely to die to a vending machine in comparison to a shark doesn't mean vending machines are safer than sharks. Ask yourself this: how often have you been around vending machines? Ok, now how often have you been around sharks? I guarantee that if you swam past sharks as many times as you walked past vending machines you would have been eaten eons ago. Each paragraph will be a test.

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