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Shel Silverstein and Talv - The Slithergadee with a twist by me
The Slithergadee has crawled out of the sea He may catch all the others, but he won't catch me No you won't catch me, old Slithergadee You may catch all the others, but you won't catch-"Slurp"

JAMES D. WITMER - There Was An Old Man From Peru
There was an old man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe. When he woke with a fright in the dark of the night, he found it was perfectly true. You may think that this story's absurd, but there is more to the tale that I heard. He had skipped all his meals with a healthy-food feel and filled up on only dessert! Now, a man who eats nothing but sweets will get hungry again while he sleeps. So with nothing to do, he tried gnawing his shoe and woke again hungry and mean.

Poop! - Poop!
Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop!

Not Rem - Rem
Rem is a dork ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha!

Unknown - The Story That Never Ends
Once upon a time an old man got out his favorite book and read to his grandson. He read aloud, Once upon a time an old man got out his favorite book and read to his grandson. He read aloud, Once upon a time an old man got out his favorite book and read to his grandson. He read aloud, Once upon a time an old man got out his favorite book and read to his grandson. He read aloud, Once upon a time an old man got out his favorite book and read to his grandson. He read aloud...