Colonel Jessup
- You Can't Handle the Truth - A Few Good Men
You weep for Santiago and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know; that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline.
SS Colonel Hans Landa
- The Jew Hunter - Inglorious Basterds
Consequently, a German conducts a search of a house suspected of hiding Jews. Where does the hawk look? He looks in the barn, he looks in the attic, he looks in the cellar, he looks everywhere he would hide. But there are so many places it would never occur for a hawk to hide. However, the reason the Fuhrer has brought me to French cow country is because it does occur to me. Because I'm aware what tremendous feats human beings are capable of once they abandon dignity.
Caine
- You Never Know - Menace II Society
Went into the store just to get a beer. Came out an accessory to murder and armed robbery. It's funny like that in the hood sometimes. You never know what was gonna happen, or when. After that, I knew it was gonna be a long summer.
Tim Tebow
- The Promise
You have never seen any player in the entire country play as hard as I will play the rest of this season, and you'll never see someone push the rest of the team as hard as I will push everybody the rest of this season. You'll never see a team play harder than we will the rest of this season. God bless.
Anonymous
- Wait for the Punchline
A guy is taking his girlfriend to prom. He waits in the ticket line for a really long time, but finally gets them. He goes to rent a limo. The rental line is really long, but eventually he does it. He goes to buy flowers. The line at the florist is really long, but he eventually gets the flowers. At prom, she asks him to get punch. He goes to the refreshment table and there's no punchline.
Anonymous
- A really bad joke
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Amal. The other goes to a family in Spain, and is named Juan. Years later, Juan sends a picture to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband she wishes she had a picture of Amal. He says, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!"
White Goodman
- Globo Gym - Dodgeball
Here at Globo Gym, we understand that ugliness and fatness are genetic disorders, like baldness or necrophilia, and it's your fault if you don't hate yourself enough to do something about it.
Dennis
- King Arthur - Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Listen, strange women lying in ponds and distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
Charlie Babbitt
- Rain Man - I Have a Brother
I just realized I'm not pissed off anymore. My father cut me out of his will. You probably knew he tried to contact me over the years. I never called him back. I was a prick. If he was my son and didn't return my calls, I'd have written him out. But it's not about money anymore. You know, I just don't understand. Why didn't he tell me I had a brother?
Major Monogram
- I Give Up Evil
Doofenshmirtz claims to have given up evil. He even signed this "I Give Up Evil" affidavit to apply for work at the agency - and normally we could have rejected him because he's not an animal, but, as it turns out, he was adopted by ocelots, making him, in the eyes of the law, an ocelot.
Margaret Atwood
- Exactly the Way it Was - The Handmaid's Tale
It's impossible to say a thing exactly the way it was. Because what you say can never be exact; you always have to leave something out. There are too many parts, sides, crosscurrents, nuances; too many gestures, which could mean this or that. Too many flavors, in the air or on the tongue. Half-colors. Too many.
George Orwell
- All Animals Are Equal - Animal Farm
"My sight is failing," she said finally. "Are the Seven Commandments the same as they used to be, Benjamin?" For once Benjamin consented to break his rule, and he read out to her what was written on the wall. There was nothing there now except a single Commandment. It ran: ALL ANIMALS ARE EQUAL. BUT SOME ANIMALS ARE MORE EQUAL THAN OTHERS.
George Orwell
- Resemble Man - Animal Farm
I have little more to say. I merely repeat, remember always your duty of enmity toward Man and all his ways. Whatever goes upon two legs is an enemy. Whatever goes upon four legs, or has wings, is a friend. And remember also that in fighting against Man, we must not come to resemble him. Even when you have conquered him, do not adopt his vices.
Mr. Robot
- Crossing Lines - Mr. Robot
There it is. That sense of dread. It only happens when you cross a line you didn't even know existed. Maybe that dread is a good thing. After all, when you realize you've crossed a line, that means you still had one. But when those crossed lines are all behind you, up ahead is only darkness.
Mobley
- People are People - Mr. Robot
People are just people. Right? When it gets down to it, everyone is the same. They love something. They want something. They fear something. Specifics help, but specifics don't change the way that everyone is vulnerable. It just changes the way that we access those vulnerabilities.
Judy Geller
- Chandler - FRIENDS
Chandler, you've been Ross's best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems, and now you've taken on Monica as well. Well, I don't know what to say. You're a wonderful human being.
Kuzco
- My Story - The Emperor's New Groove
Will you take a look at that? Pretty pathetic, huh? Well, you'll never believe this, but that llama you're looking at was once a human being. And not just any human being. That guy was an emperor. A rich, powerful ball of charisma. Oh, yeah! This is his story. Well, actually, my story. That's right... I'm that llama. The name is Kuzco... Emperor Kuzco.
Roger McNamee
- 2.5 Billion Truman Shows - The Social Dilemma
The way to think about it is as 2.5 billion Truman Shows. Each person has their own reality with their own facts. Over time, you have the false sense that everyone agrees with you because everyone in your news feed sounds just like you. Once you're in that state, it turns out you're easily manipulated.
Tristian Harris
- Tools - The Social Dilemma
If something is a tool, it genuinely is just sitting there, waiting patiently. If something is not a tool it's demanding things from you. It's seducing you, it's manipulating you. We've moved away from a tools based technology environment, to an addiction and manipulation based environment.
Nick Hornby
- A Long Way Down
My therapist told me a story, true story, about this guy who survived jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge. The moment he jumped he realized that the only thing in his life he couldn't fix was the thing he had just done. Can you imagine those five seconds as he fell, the agony of that? Well to me it feels like I felt without falling.
