An unspoken pass-time of mine is the random imagining of origins. I've long wanted to shake the hand of the first Inca who discovered beef jerky, although I imagine it tasted awful. I'd like to the think the men who invented the tube guy had a good sense of humor and laughed until their sides hurt when the first one was sent flapping its arms joyously into the air. I imagine the first man to have invented the condom a vain man with an English accent who advertised it as a sheath.