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Kenzie Sauer
A fundamental misunderstanding of depression.

Brenda Shaughnessy
Well you can actually make it go slower than 1 second per second if you …

Anonymous
changed eve to even

Some Disney Princess
I swear, didn't that happen to the Mongolian Empire lol

Satan
NO. JUST NO. WHY. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO REMIND ME OF THIS ABSOLUTE TORTURE

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user49606's quotes

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Unknown - Fates beyond death
We both know that there are fates far worse than death, Tom. Merely taking your life would not satisfy me, I admit. We are going to play a game. I am going to break one of your fingers. If you remain uncooperative, I will break another. We will continue this process with each bone in your body until you will cooperate. Then I, your ever so gracious master, will grant you death.

Unknown - Brake Fluid
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime. You probably think this is just another cheesy pun, nonetheless you're paying more attention to each word now, trying to predict what the next witticism will be. You'll probably spend all night thinking about this pun until it dawns on you.

Unknown - The batt
Show me somebody who says the battlefield isn't that bad and I'll show you a liar. You get used to the explosions after the first few weeks, of course by then the larger portion of your hearing is already gone. The hard part is spending time with your battle buddies, knowing that some of you'll be taking a dirt nap. The only thing strong enough to penetrate the jumble of worries and aches that fill your head is the prospect of seeing your loved ones again. That and the bad end of a bullet.

J.K. Rowling - Power
He is with me wherever I go. I met him when I traveled around the world. A foolish young man I was then, full of ridiculous ideas about good and evil. Lord Voldemort showed me how wrong I was. There is no good and evil, there is only power, and those too weak to seek it... Since then, I have served him faithfully, although I have let him down many times. He has to be very hard on me. He does not forgive mistakes easily.