They say once an addict, always an addict. That you will never truly defeat your addiction, you can only begin to "recover." It is a battle you will fight for the rest of your life. I guess what I am trying to say is, that just like the behavior of an addict, the behavior of someone who loves, or has loved, an addict doesn't go away either. I may not have been the one using, but my fear is real, my worry is real, and I am just as twisted.