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April Ludgate (Parks and Rec) - House Rules
We have a couple of house rules, though. You can't use the front door. You have to climb in through the back window. No personal phone conversations. If you ever speak to me in Spanish, please use the formal 'usted'. And no electricity after 6:00 PM. A couple more rules: If you ever watch a sad movie, you have to wear mascara so we can see whether or not you've been crying. There's no noise allowed on Mondays. And no TV after breakfast.

Jean Ralphio (Parks and Rec) - Crazy Night
The craziest of crazies: clubs, girls, dancing, naked milfs, argument, police, fleeing the scene, hiding in a dumpster, coming here and crashing on your couch 'cause technically I'm homeless.