I felt distant and unknown to life. My feelings clouded without the meaning of life or knowledge of purpose. I had no goals, no ambition, no motivation and no feelings. As soon as my perception of death was altered, watching friends and family perish into the unknown, my life changed. I can't live like this anymore, I can't travel into the unknown, being hurt repetitively throughout time until it's time to say goodbye. I must find a way, I can't, I won't fail. I need to have faith.