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Hello my name is Barack Obama (President of United States) 1,000 years ago sorry I’m …

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Ricky Gervais - Drunk Driving
But now people know that's wrong. I've done it once and I'm not proud of it. I'm ashamed of it. That was Christmas. I wasn't drunk, but I was over the limit. I took the car out and I knew I shouldn't. I knew I shouldn't be driving. But I learned my lesson, because I nearly killed an old woman. No, in the end I didn't kill her. In the end I just sexually assaulted her.